Decided to impulsively apply for a flat at HDB. Not really impulsive without the consideration of financial planning, more on booking base on which will be completed the soonest, without consideration on the location.. lol. But I would probably not be able to book successfully due to high que number.
I was out today for quite a bit. I think a lot of brisk walk, maybe around 20mins. Went to imh for my appointment after 2 months, and guess what? The doctor is on mc!
Imagine how resentful I felt. I waited grudgingly for my turn because the appointment will be video call base, having half the mind to be quite un participative and resistant.
It was not even a psychotherapy session, just a doctor appointment that will be around 30-40 mins. Did I miss out something, apparently when they did a triage call with me, I didn't fit in with the criteria for therapy session. huh?
The call eventually turn out to be more than an hour long, I was sure that there was another patient right after me, but I think she got deferred to another doctor? My resentment quickly disappear, because the doctor really sounded sick, constantly coughing and blowing nose. He was genuinely quite concern with what has been happening around me and wanted to know a lot of details related to childhood. I felt bad for being resentful earlier. Honestly don't remember any details at all around primary school, which I wonder if it's normal. I think I just have a very bad memory. So embarrassing. Guess what, he recommended dynamic therapy, whatever that means. who knows how many months away that will be.
SOO, I think I'm going to quit my current job and informed my boss tomorrow. !!
I'm excited because, time to look for new job..! (sarcasm intended)
and Holy f.ck, this really got me excited. Heart race, not the good looks, but the music and dance and energy, all SO impactful. 3:59 this song is the best. Jung Kook has such intense gaze. His energy is absolutely amazing. Love this!
I feel really scared and uncertain, when this feeling of hope, creeps in. I was not able to find hope , didn't want to, but I still follow the motions of what I should do. So now, people tells me what to do to find that hope again, I listen and I try.. What if I fail again, what if I still can't. what if this weekend, I got drown , and couldn't step out of my misery again.
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